How to Let Go of Social Pressure – Follow My Proven Tips

One of the biggest culprits when it comes to being unhappy about your life is social pressure. It’s everywhere: it’s there when you talk to your friends or coworkers, when you watch your favorite TV show, quickly check what’s happening on Instagram, when you read the news headlines, or read your younger self’s ramblings in your old diary.

Somehow the idea of a perfect life seems so attainable, yet impossible to achieve.

In this post, I want to help you spot the unnecessary social pressure in your life and start letting it go. You deserve to be happy and content with your life without constantly wondering whether you should be a better version of yourself or have a bigger house already. All in good time.

Spot the social pressure

As I said, social pressure is everywhere, often without you even noticing it. When you become better at spotting it, it will be easier to ignore it. You’re doing well in life already, there’s no need to feel worse just because someone else is doing something different or because they’re closer to the life you have pictured for your future.

Now, I want you to take a couple of minutes to think about the social pressure you experience.

Naturally, one of the main sources of pressure and feelings of inferiority is social media. Whether you use Instagram, TikTok, or Youtube, you’re constantly exposed to pictures and videos of people who seemingly have a better life than you. They live in your dream city, have a bigger apartment, a tight-knit friend group, a perfect spouse, and they probably just got tickets to that event you’d love to go to but can’t.

I don’t need to tell you that that’s definitely not the whole picture and no one’s life is actually perfect.

It’s not just online that you are exposed to this unnecessary pressure. Talking to your friends or having your aunt ask what’s new with you can have the same effect.

One problem is that the norms and expectations of older generations heavily affect us today. What was normal a century ago still lingers in the collective mind, even when it doesn’t serve the same purpose. Marriage was much more important back then than it is now, owning a house mattered greatly when rentals were practically nonexistent, and having children was a no-brainer when people had less freedom.

It could also be that the person behind the unnecessary pressure in your life is you. Perhaps you have always pictured yourself with a successful career, a big family, an expensive wardrobe, or exceptional talent in painting.

Whatever it is, if you haven’t achieved it yet or perhaps haven’t even pursued it, it can make you feel inferior to others or behind in life, and it’s all for no reason. Figuring out what exactly it is that you want takes time, and making it all happen takes much longer. Let yourself be you and enjoy the journey.

It’s not worth your time anyway

One extremely important thing to keep in mind is that it really isn’t worth it to dwell on other people’s opinions and expectations.

I mean, people might be impressed by you or your life – for like two seconds. But just like you, everyone focuses mainly on their own life.

You really don’t want to waste your life and precious time on something that doesn’t make you happy or help you build a better life for yourself. You’re more important than other people’s opinions.

This is what you need to do

If you are being weighed down by excessive social pressure, you need to take action.

First of all, you need to figure out what exactly you genuinely want from life. You shouldn’t care about anyone else’s opinion, even if you are getting some comments from people around you.

Then I suggest you take some time to declutter your social media (something I always recommend). You should ruthlessly unfollow every account that makes you feel bad in any way, and replace them with ones that make you feel calm, good, inspired, and understood.

Better yet, delete accounts and apps that don’t serve you and help you create a happier life for yourself. I guarantee it’s going to make a difference in your everyday life.

I’d also like to advise you not to follow too many of the same kind of accounts. This is because seeing too much of the same content can make you think that that’s the norm and you should follow it, even though it’s just one of the many ways to live your life.

For example, cottagecore content can help you distance yourself from the hustle culture content (if that is what you wish) and make you feel more at ease with your life, but it can also make you feel like what you should do is move to the English countryside, get ducks, and live in a Beatrix Potter book, when in reality it’s just one option among many and for sure less glamorous in real life.

Another thing that in my opinion helps immensely is keeping yourself very busy. This helps because then you don’t have time to think too much and wonder whether the grass really is greener on the other side. That’s one of the reasons I like to stick to my daily goals, the most important one of which is to write 1000 words.

Now then, an important question.

Are there any people you know, like old friends, that make you feel less than? If yes, think long and hard about them and what you know about their lives. This can surprisingly help you feel much better.

I have a couple of old friends who sometimes give me that little twang of feeling of failing at life because their lives are basically straight out of a societal norms textbook, whereas I feel like I’m always getting a low grade on living by the norms.

But, when I stop to think about their lives, it becomes clear as day that their lives are precisely what I don’t want. I assume and hope that they are happy with their lives, but just between you and me, I can tell you that I’d be miserable in their jobs, relationships, and houses, and living their everyday life. It’s just not for me.

I feel a little bad for thinking about the negative aspects of other people’s lives, but in all honesty, it’s good for your happiness and mental health. It makes you realize what is right for you and that their lives are not perfect either. And no one’s going to know your thoughts. 

Replace the pressure with focus

Once you know what you want and what you don’t want, you can focus on your life. Little by little, the pressure will fade, and you will be happy on your own path.

In a way, the key to all of this is really happiness; once you feel content with your own life, whatever other people are doing doesn’t make you feel this way or that way.

So start focusing on your own goals and dreams, get busy working on them, and the rest will follow. I can assure you that eventually letting go of all social pressure will be easy, even if it takes some time to figure it all out.

If you need any goal ideas, you can find some here: 12 Great Goals for Ambitious Young Women

Do let me know what you think about this post and if you have any topics in mind you’d like me to write about, feel free to share them!